Happy Birthday Dad

Hey Boss,

I just wanted to write you a quick note as the dogs and I wrap up the preparations for your birthday tomorrow. It sounds a bit strange to me to be celebrating your birthday more than four months after your passing, but I decided that it will make me happy to celebrate you – and the special love that we shared.

We are going to start the day with a trip to Doggie Fun Land in Ferrysburg.  After dropping the dogs at home, I’ll pop over to Orchard Market to pick-up a big old porterhouse steak and some of those little cupcakes that you always enjoyed.  I debated about baking a cake for you, as I did every year, but I’ve been doing really well with my blood sugar lately and I don’t want to mess that up.

In the afternoon, Pal has an appointment at Harborfront Hospital for Animals.  He just turned nine this month and he’s due for his annual physical.  It just seemed appropriate on your birthday to take an old man to an appointment with a doctor.  Paladin graciously offered to fill in for you.

After his visit, we’ll stop in at the City Farmer to pick up a box of peanut butter bones for the dogs.  They are still Sue’s favorite food to play with, and she teases Pal and I mercilessly when she has one in her mouth.

Then it will be home to make dinner.  I’ll grill up the steak just the way you liked it – marinated in Worcestershire sauce and seasoned with salt and pepper.  I’m going to split it three ways with Sue and Pal.  I’m also going to share the cupcakes with them.  You should see Sue and Pal on a sugar buzz!  When I came home from your memorial service, I put the leftover cake on the kitchen counter while I changed.  When I came back into the kitchen, there were two happy looking dogs laying on the kitchen floor with some cardboard and plastic wrap between them.  About half an hour later, the two of them were running around the house like young pups – playing with all of the toys, teasing each other, barking at each other, and just having a great time.

After they eat their 9:30 treats, the three of us will snuggle in together on Pal’s couch for our moment of Irish Setter Zen.  And we will sing happy birthday to you.

It won’t be the party that we’ve thrown for you the last several years.  I haven’t invited anybody over, I didn’t buy balloons, or any of that party stuff.

It is still pretty lonely in the house without you, but as I promised you, Sue, Pal and I are taking care of each other.

Happy Birthday Dad!  We will always celebrate your memory.

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Mel Is Still Being Mel

My father & I at a Piston's game

Dad & I at a Piston's game

I’ve often said that you haven’t really been to a place until you’ve been there with Mel.

Dad always enjoyed going to new places – not just to see new sights, but also to meet new people.  He fully enjoyed life everywhere he was, and he shared that joy with everybody that he encountered.  It didn’t matter where or when, there were always people that he hadn’t met yet – and they would become new friends.  And more often than not, there were people there that he already knew – creating a joyful reunion of old friends.

Camden Yards ballpark in Baltimore

Camden Yards

For example, in 1996 I was working on a job site near Baltimore, MD.   As I often did, I flew Dad out for a weekend visit.  We had tickets for an afternoon Orioles game at Camden Yards, where we not only had a great time watching the game, but we got to stuff ourselves on Boog Powell’s BBQ in the outfield concourse.  To fill time before the game, Dad had said that he would like to visit the grave of Edgar Allan Poe.

The gravesite of Edgar Allan Poe in Baltimore, MD

Edgar Allan Poe's grave

So we added a trip to the grave to our itinerary.  Since I had no idea where the grave was actually located, we left fairly early in the morning to allow ourselves time to locate the site.

We had no trouble locating the site.  We found it immediately on the first try.  It was fascinating, and we spent almost an hour there.  This still left us with several hours to kill.

Dad decided that since we had time to kill we should try to locate the old Memorial Stadium.  Dad had fond memories of watching Johnny Unitas on TV, as well as all of those old Oriole greats.  So off we went to find Memorial Stadium.

Baltimore's Memorial Stadium

Memorial Stadium

And find it we did.  The stadium is tucked away in a residential neighborhood.  We walked the entire perimeter of the facility from across the street to get a good look at the outside of the famous horseshoe shaped building.  And it was amazing.  But since nobody was using the facility at the time, it was a bit boring.  As we stood outside the fence at the open end of the horseshoe, a security guard walked past.

Dad struck up a conversation with him, and in no time we were enjoying a private tour of the place, from the locker rooms to the press box and all stops in between!  That’s just part of the fun when you traveled someplace with Mel.

Behold, the power of the Dum Dum!

Behold, the power of the Dum Dum!

On Wednesday, I posted the eulogy that I presented at Dad’s memorial service.  Part of that eulogy included a tribute to the power of the Dum Dum sucker.  Coach Hall always used Dum Dums to recognize and reward the accomplishments of the athletes on his track and field teams.

Lo and behold, on Thursday morning I found this e-mail from Dean Spangler, the Chairman and CEO of the Spangler Candy Company, the makers of Dum Dums!

Jim:
It is apparent that your father, Mel, was a remarkable man.
Our sincere condolenses to you and your family.

Your blog popped up because of the reference to Dum Dums.

As I read your "Eulogy for My Father" I was quite moved. I
have great fondness for good teachers and people that find
the good in life.  Your father had both those traits.  While
we hear many wonderful stories about Dum Dums, I just wanted
you to know that this one probably resonated more than any 
other.

I too was blessed to have a wonderful father.  He has been 
gone 34 years now and still thoughts of him brighten my days 
and inspire me to be better.  I will try to be a little 
better person today for him, and for Mel.

Dean L. Spangler
Chairman & CEO
Spangler Candy Company
"The Dum Dums Company"
The Spangler Candy Company

Spangler Candy - makers of Dum Dums

Even from beyond the pale, Dad is still reaching out to others.  I’m so proud that Mel is still being Mel!